These Shabbat dinner rituals, cultivated by our ancestors, invite you to go deeper and connect with Divinity, queer community, and your highest Shabbat intentions. Just as the Shabbat evening service brings together multiple aspects of Divinity, you are here invited to gather in community, with chosen family, beloveds, or even with different aspects of your own self.  On Shabbat, we let go of whatever has occurred in the past week, and open to all the possibilities of rest. It is said...

Take a moment to think about what you most want to receive this Shabbat, and then consider that which you would most like to let go of. Inhale, inviting that which you want to receive, and exhale, releasing that which no longer serves.  Light a pair of candles, then draw the light towards you with your hands by circling the flames three times. Recite the blessing while covering your eyes, and then take in the beauty of the Shabbat lights.  בְּרוּךֶ...

It is traditional for husbands to bless their wives after candle lighting, but this tradition doesn’t often resonate for queer couples, let alone straight couples who don’t necessarily fit standard gender roles.  The following blessing can be used by couples of any gender, regardless of their marital status.  Partner 1: As day turns to night,  And afternoon light fades into inky black,  May we recognize the love bringing us together Like the twin flames of the Shabbat candles, Soft and luminous   ...

As the traditional Shabbat children’s blessings are gendered, here is an alternative blessing to use with children of any gender.  We give thanks for the blessing that is you,  Your being,  Your becoming   Every day we witness your growth, Your curiosity,  Your persistence   And we give thanks For every new lesson  As you become,  More and more each day,  The person you are meant to be.

Our communities include people who are not in long-term partnered relationships, whether by choice or circumstance. If this is you, take a moment to celebrate yourself this Shabbat with this blessing for the solo person.  This Shabbat, amidst the growing twilight,  I affirm myself in my full dignity,  In my truth,  And in my lived experience   I celebrate my resilience And my wholeness,  My fortitude and my strength   And I name and bless myself  As a sovereign being Under a canopy...

Having blessed each other or ourselves, we now bless the wine or grape juice, pausing to recognize the holiness of this moment and the beauty of sanctification. Feel free to whisper into the cup something that you’re yearning for before you say the blessing and take the first sip.    בְּרוּךֶ אָתֶה ײַ,  אֱלֹהִימוֹתֵינוּ מַלְכֶּת הָעוֹלָם, בּוֹרָאת פְּרִי הַגָּֽפֶן Bruche ateh Adonai Elohimoteinu Malket ha’Olam, borat p’ri hagafen.

Before we eat, we wash our hands. It is customary to sing a nigun, or wordless melody, in place of speech while you are waiting for everyone to finish washing. Pour water three times onto each hand, and recite the blessing. Is there anything from this week that you’d like to wash away in preparation for the Shabbat meal?  בְּרוּךֶ אָתֶה ײַ, אֱלֹהִימוֹתֵינוּ מַלְכֶּת הָעוֹלָם, אֲשֶׁר קִדְשֶׁנוּ בְּמִצְוֹתֶיהֶ וְצִוֶנוּ עַל נְטִילַת יָדַיִם Bruche ateh Adonai Elohimoteinu Malket ha’Olam asher kidshenu b’mitzvoteihe,...

Once everyone has assembled back at the table, it’s time to bless the challah. First, take a moment to close your eyes. Feel the line of your body against the chair and your feet on the floor. See if you can sense the earth beneath the floor beneath your feet, and remember that we are a part of nature. Spend a moment or two feeling the support of the earth beneath you, and then open your eyes.  בְּרוּךֶ אָתֶה ײַ, אֱלֹהִימוֹתֵינוּ...

While you enjoy your Shabbat meal, here are some questions to prompt reflection and discussion at your table.  What are some different approaches to rest and play we can try and indulge in this Shabbat? Bonus points for going beyond Netflix on the couch!  We might think of our queer communities as sacred spaces. What makes them sacred?  What feels alive for you this Shabbat? What possibilities for connection and creativity are unfolding for you and/or your community?  How can we...

As dinner winds down, it’s time to give appreciation for the meal and the abundance of nature.  We give thanks for the earth and its sustenance, For this food and drink, and this Shabbat rest, May we one day see a coming of time when all is Shabbat.

Happy New Year! Traditionally, the Jewish New Year, Rosh Hashanah, is a time of introspection and reflection. How did we do in the past year? What are we hoping to change in the coming year? During this meal we will rejoice in being together, and think backwards on the year that was, and forward to the year that will be. Plus delicious food, puns, and casting off some bad karma. To a sweet new year!

Happy New Year! Traditionally, the Jewish New Year, Rosh Hashanah, is a time of introspection and reflection. How did we do in the past year? What are we hoping to change in the coming year? During this meal we will rejoice in being together, and think backwards on the year that was, and forward to the year that will be. Plus delicious food, puns, and casting off some bad karma. To a sweet new year!

Nearly all Jewish holiday begin with lighting candles, and so this one will, too. After we light the candles we wave our hands in three big horizontal circles to symbolically bring the light closer to us, and then cover our eyes while we say the blessing. When the blessing is over take a moment of silent reflection with your eyes covered, and then open your eyes and enjoy the beauty of candlelight, bringing you into the new year. בָּרוּךְ אַתָּה יְיָ...